Friday, January 28, 2011

A Spoonful of Measure

Like the East Wind
It doesn't go around you
It blows right through you.
- Gordon Downey




I still get this incredible welling of pride when I read Shakespeare and actually grasp it on the first try without any help. I'm like Sally Field up there at the podium. "I'm smart enough. I'm really smart enough."

The second I learned about Liev's hankering to do Measure for Measure, I was all over that thing. Having a Shakespeare kink means it's not a question of if, but when. You know you're going to get to them all so.... Measure did get bumped to the front of the queue. 

What I like about M4M is that you have the feel of a real ensemble cast - it's less about one man or one event. As Liev says at the Young Shakespearean panel, it's really about sex. Like a super-delicious Elizabethan Melrose Place, it's choc-full of duplicitous, morally ambiguous players, bed-hopping their way in and out of each other's lives with a  few genuine souls thrown in for good Measure. (sorry, had to)

What is a bit of a shame (and I'm not sure if Liev and other trained minds are aware since this stuff apparantly came to them instinctually back in the womb) is that for some reason it seems extra complicated with all the "bed tricks" and disguises. Is it because it's just one big double-entendre and my mind keeps wanting to go there? Maybe an academic (or a shrink) can shed some light.

I read something the other day which reminded me of this. I apologize as I do not have it with me but there's a bit in David Mamet's (much quoted here) book where he talks about his family sitting down to play a new board game. Someone started reading the rules and everyone almost gave up because it sounded so convaluted. Then, his wife suddenly remembered having played it as a child and was able to explain it in like 10 seconds. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and the game began.

I think that's what Measure for Measure needs - someone to come in and set the table. We don't know what's for supper yet, but we know it's going to be good.

So, I've decided that's going to be ME! I'm going to do my best to whet all your appetites for more. It would be such a shame to not get right behind this (hopeful ) endeavour of Liev's just because there's a little work involved.

Let's see if this seems at all tempting or at least amusing to you.

***
FADE IN:

INT. DUKE VINCENTIO'S CASTLE - VIENNA - DAY

VINCENTIO
Dude, I'm going out of town for awhile on business.
Can you do me a solid and hold down the fort?

ANGELO
I've got your back.

VINCENTIO
Great. And don't let any of that
extramarital sex we both hate so much
get out of control around here while I'm gone.

ANGELO
I'm your man.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. STREET CORNER - VIENNA - DAY

LUCIO
Hey, how about those venereal diseases?
They really cramp a guy's style.

MAN ON STREET
True dat.

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Speaking of promiscuity, did you
guys hear CLAUDIO's going to jail?

LUCIO
No shit, why?

MISTRESS OVERDONE
You know what a tight-ass ANGELO is.
Now that he's in charge we're all screwed.
Or, should I say not screwed?
He's clamping down on everything.
No fun allowed.

LUCIO
For real?

MISTRESS OVERDONE
All of a sudden he's even enforcing
that old "no pre-marital sex" law. 

LUCIO
Whoa.
(beat)
I know a ton of people who've
been shacked up for ages!

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Yup. He's even shut down my Mustang
Ranch and -   

LUCIO
- Holy crap!

MISTRESS OVERDONE
I know. I know. It's just so harsh.
(whimpering)
It's my bread and butter, man. 

LUCIO
Don't worry. People can't live without
your specialized services for long.
They'll always find a way.

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Aww, that's sweet, thanks.
I sure hope you're right.

LUCIO 
Why now?

MISTRESS OVERDONE
(still sniffling and weeping slightly)
What?

LUCIO
Why's ANGELO suddenly freaking out
like this? And why CLAUDIO?   

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Well...
(beat)
the thing is...

LUCIO
What.
(frustrated) 
Just tell me.

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Well, CLAUDIO's... uh..
I...  JULIET's pregnant. 

LUCIO
WHAT?

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Yeah, I know. It's bad. And now-

LUCIO
- So what does this mean?

MISTRESS OVERDONE
Oh. Yes.
(nodding)
Yeah.
(beat)
He'd dead for sure.

FADE OUT:

***

P.S. Someone who attended Liev's talk at Yale tonight just mentioned that he was speaking about scansion. Thinking this may be some kind of fish or a small, kite-like toy, I decided to Google it. Turns out it has to do with analyzing timing and rhythm in poetry. 

I guess < I > could really have used tonight's lesson from Professor Liev.

Am I even qualified to be talking about this? People, I read poetry because I love it! My degree is in Social Work.

Aaaaand, back to feeling like a total dork again.  

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